Flaccid pizza; nipple custard; tasty brown balls.

September 13, 2010 § 1 Comment

Good afternooooon!

Hope you’re all in the mood for some juvenile innuendo, if so, do I have a teat treat for you!

Last night I had some chums who live locally over for vegan eats and attempted study. The study element was lacking, however we did bash out some fairly respectable culinary offerings, even if they were a little perverse in their nature.

Presenting, flaccid pizza. Flop flop all over the shop.

The guests remained dubious. It was not your average thin-n-crispy, that’s for sure. Damn you gluten-free quinoa-flour base!

However, after wobbling each flaccid slice in front of their gaping jowls and taking a tentative nibble, the meal was declared a success! Flop or not, this was one tasty vegan variation on a traditionally meaty main. (See how to make vegan no-cheese-please pizza here!)

Served alongside some kale & spinach salad with chickpeas, beetroot, carrot, zucchini & coriander.

I also promised you nipple custard.

Ok so I admit it takes a little imagination, however if your mind is so inclined, take a moment to appreciate the well-formed, aptly-coloured aesthetics of this (vegan) custard & rhubarb treat.

Rhubarb rhubarb rhubarb.

This particular recipe had been built up to epic proportions by the health-master Dave, and we were finally allowed a glimpse into the complicated processes of producing such a dish.

Evidently, the fine art of vegan custard involved a packet, and a thorough reading of the supplied instructions.

Now now, I’ll lay off the sarcasm. As much as I subject pre-packaged foods to hearty criticism, this particular custard powder was pretty grand being vegan-friendly, gluten free and all natural. And once the proffered dessert crossed our lips, we were silent while we concentrated hard on the deliciousness of the custard/rhubarb pairing and the added bonus of it’s boob-ey resemblance. Very tasty, thanks Dave!

And finally, the lovely Fay supplied some fabulous brown balls that were a delicious 3rd course treat.

I believe they contained almond meal, cacao powder, honey, coconut oil & tahini. Exceptionally good with herbal tea & great company.

Other food yesterday included an awesome quinoa/black-bean/raw salad/coriander & hummus with lemon & paprika bowl.

These are so fast & easy, I’d suggest you get up and make one right now! Go on, the quinoa is calling.

And that signals dinnertime for me! I’m outta here to make some sweet sweet love in the kitchen 🙂



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